The mystics, the enlightened ones all say we are one. Quantum physics says everything exists in a sea of energy modulated into near infinite dimensions. The forms within those dimensions  are created by consciousness. Now I am going to make a leap and say that the more connected we are to other consciousness resonating with high ideals and values the happier and calmer we become. When Jesus said I bring you a new commandment, love one another, this ideal was meant to supplant the effects of living according to laws of what not to do. And, we know whatever we are thinking about preceded with a not or don’t (e.g., don’t think about green elephants with pink monkeys dancing on them) will be seen in the mind symbolically, as thoughts and words exist symbolically.

Robert Waldinger is reporting on a study run for decades and the results say that good connections with others is the primary indicator for health and happiness. Reviewing this study has made me even more grateful for the people in my life that share the love I have to offer and reflect that back to me. I know you will like this video. It may change your life significantly for the better as you apply this knowledge.

This is a concluding paragraph to a Ted Talk by Robert Waldinger

So this message, that good, close relationships are good for our health and well-being, this is wisdom that’s as old as the hills. Why is this so hard to get and so easy to ignore? Well, we’re human. What we’d really like is a quick fix, something we can get that’ll make our lives good and keep them that way. Relationships are messy and they’re complicated and the hard work of tending to family and friends, it’s not sexy or glamorous. It’s also lifelong. It never ends. The people in our 75-year study who were the happiest in retirement were the people who had actively worked to replace workmates with new playmates. Just like the millennials in that recent survey, many of our men when they were starting out as young adults really believed that fame and wealth and high achievement were what they needed to go after to have a good life. But over and over, over these 75 years, our study has shown that the people who fared the best were the people who leaned in to relationships, with family, with friends, with community.

Here is the link to the talk The Link >

Bronnie Ware wrote a book based on her experiences as a nurse caring for the dying. She wrote a book called The Five Top Regrets of the Dying.

Here is her list and commentary:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look 30clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”